I AM BETTER THAN YOU (parenting)

My personal parenting skills are level 10 and far beyond what the average person can accomplish

When it comes to life, living a full life, being fully happy and content, people find the greatest fulfillment and the greatest heartache through the process of raising kids – except me. I am so good at this that I never have the bad stuff, just the good.

How do you define success as a parent?

Obviously, I define success as everything I do. Others would probably define it as how “happy” the child is. I have never known my kids to be anything other than happy.

Are they happy?

Another way you can define success – for others, of course – is how safe are your kids? Do you put them in dangerous situations? Do you put them on a bike, for example and push them down the driveway before they know how to brake? Do you allow them to walk to the edge of a cliff or waterfall? Do you check to see if their tires are bald before they drive in a rainstorm? Do you even care about them at all? Of course, my kids are always completely safe and secure.

Are they safe?

Are they healthy?

As we all know, some parents, not me, but some parents will give their kids SUGAR. Ugh. What kind of fun, laugh-inducing, smile-making parent are you? Don’t you know that sugar is the bane of all existence? How could you?

We have always been the kind of parents who do the right thing from the start. Some parents start their kids off with sugar, give them more sugar and promise sugar for rewards.

If you raise your kids right, like me, you will teach them to always respond to you with respect, always make wise choices and always eat healthy.

In fact, they will learn, with proper parenting, to hate sugar. This will take work that most unperfect parents would never attempt. I am glad I am here to model such perfection.

How do they present themselves in public?

If you do EVERYTHING RIGHT, like me, then your kids will look and act like angels in pubic. they will never do or say anything that would embarrass you or be a negative hit to your stellar reputation.

Finally, if you are perfect, your instincts are perfect, too.

Do NOT ever, ever let a child talk you out of something that you know is the right decision. They are to obey you at all times and no amount of begging, pleading or sad faces should ever lead you to change your mind about something you haphazardly decided upon. I know I never have.

Lee “not” giving in to Audrey…..

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